Great Expectations: Pamela @ 34 weeks

Since my last entry, three of my friends have had babies. My first friend was 41 weeks and 1 day pregnant with her third child. From first contraction to birth of her daughter was 30 minutes. All of her labor and deliveries were super-fast, so this was not totally unexpected for her and her husband, but wow. Baby came fast!! My second friend was 38 weeks and 5 days pregnant with her third child. Her birth began with trickling amniotic fluid and ended almost 21 hours later with the birth of her son with a little hand up next to his cheek. All her births lasted varying lengths of time but each was entirely memorable in their own way. As impatient as she seemed when she was hours into her labor, she remained strong and positive and once her little dude got into position, it wasn't long until he was in her arms. My third friend was 39 weeks and 1 day pregnant with her first child. She was induced due to a genetic issue and from what I've heard the induction went smoothly and her little girl was born a little bit before noon yesterday. I'd like to give these brave, strong mamas a HUGE hug for all their strength and patience to grow a baby over 9 months, prepare for his or her arrival, and then labor them into their arms. Despite being pregnant with my third, I am still in awe in the power of our bodies and what we can accomplish. These women give me power and inspiration as I prepare for our own arrival in a few weeks.

I've been chugging along over here pretty well, I suppose. The hurricane brought historically low pressure and an emotional downslide that lasted until I saw the sun again. I have been on insulin now for a week and haven't seen a huge impact on my blood sugar numbers but at the same time, it *was* just Halloween and I may have taken some candy from my kids' buckets. I am feeling confident that I can do what I need to do for the next 4-8 weeks to have a healthy me and a healthy baby, but it's not easy. When I first started the insulin I felt like I had failed in my care; how could I become dependent on this outside thing to be healthy? The more I've read, though, and the more I learn about diabetes in general, I know that what I am doing is best for me and baby so I am at peace with it now.

As we round our final weeks as a family of four, we decided to take the boys out of preschool and spend the time together enjoying the holidays before the chaos of a newborn. Thad's family is arriving for the holidays, too, so I am hoping to spend the next week or so getting the baby's room ready so I can focus the rest of my time until the birth on my boys and nurturing our relationship. Tomorrow my husband and mother in law are painting the baby's room so I can finally start bringing up the baby stuff from storage and prepare his things.

A big part of our preparation has been to talk with the boys about baby brother's arrival and how things will change around here. Our favorite books are We're Having a Home Birth by Kelly Mochel, and Baby on the Way by Dr. Sears. We tailor the stories to our family and our plans and the boys love reading them. It has made Julian very excited about Baby-San's arrival and he has told me that he wants to rub my back when I am in labor and he hopes I squat and make sounds like an elephant' when he is born. Dash is looking forward to making the birthday cake with the grandmothers. Preparing the boys for the birth and seeing their excitement about our growing family makes me excited to see how these brothers will grow up together. I've deliberately been telling the boys that after baby brother is born mommy is going to need to rest and recover. When Dash was born we didn't quite know how recovery was going to be since it was my first vaginal birth and I wish I had prepared Julian more for how my recovery was going to be.

I was telling my trainer today that I'm at a point now where my focus has shifted to the postpartum period. Sure, I am doing everything I can to be healthy but I have my routine now with my care and whether I'm ready or not, eventually I will go into labor. After the birth, however it may be, we will have a little helpless baby to care for. All I've been able to think about this week are the first few weeks of life with a newborn. For those of preparing for a baby, regardless of how far along you are, where is your brain? I'd love to hear where you are right now.

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